Lilith Schwartzman

What happens when piggies shoplift? They get put in the pigpen. Porcine pickpockets next on Sick, Sad World!

Guy Payne

But officer, how can a body apply for a green card on a red planet? Illegal aliens are out of this world in, Just Says 'No' to the Vacuum-Backs! Next, on Sick, Sad, World!

NomadX

Th-th-th-that's all folks! porky's been caught stealing the bacon and the pigs have him roasted on the floor! Next on Sick SAd World!

Gina/Jimmy

All pigs go to prison. next! on sick sad world!

Edwina

Next, on Sick, Sad World...the real reason pigs can't fly.

Gary Delatte

W.B. star arrested for car theft. When enterviewed, Mr. Pig said...

Danielle

Next on Sick Sad World.... (pauses) Oh god, I don't want to do this report! That's just wrong (whispering) no it's not in my contract. (silence, then a door slamming)